I wrote this poem back in 2005.  Some of these questions still plague me.  I know the Bible says in the days of Noah, it repented God that he had made man.  I don’t know about you…but I sure don’t want to be counted in that number!  I want to be like Noah, who found GRACE in the eyes of the Lord! -anita


I wonder…in the beginning…whenever that was…WHO was there?  Was it just You, the Father, and the Holy Ghost?

When did You create the angels?  And…who was first?  Was it Lucifer?  Or, maybe Michael…or was it all the Heavenly hosts?

How long was Lucifer on Your side?  Before he was overtaken by that ugly word called pride?

Were You surprised?  Or did You already know which way it was that he’d choose to go?

Was he your friend in the beginning? …The very twinkle in Your eye?

When he tried to take over, were You sad?  Did it make You cry?

I don’t think it did.  Not that time…not yet.  Because You hadn’t been wrapped in human form…You hadn’t paid our debt.

But afterwards…when You were in the form of a man, and walked upon this earth;  When Judas, Your friend kissed You, then sold You for much less than Your worth…

I know that hurt and made You terribly sad!  To be betrayed by one of the twelve…the only earthly friends You had.

But, now, it’s down to me, and I have to ask again….  Do You cry?  Does it make You sad, every time I sin?

To think that me, a mortal man could make YOU feel that way…I don’t understand.  It’s unfathomable…I’m not sure what to say!

Do You love me that much?  So much, it makes You cry?

I think You do…NO!  I’m sure You do!  That’s WHY You came to die!

So, now it’s up to me.  I can either hurt, or please.  I can shake my tiny fist at You…or fall down on my knees.

To disregard Your love, or ask You to forgive; it’s my choice now, I can choose…HOW do I want to live?

It’s all left up to me…shall I make You smile or cry?  Shall I choose to serve You every day… or will I just deny? 

After all that You have done for me, do I want to turn my back…and be a fool like Lucifer, and always live in lack?

No!  I want to be Your friend…the very twinkle of Your eye!  I want to make You smile…I don’t want to make You cry!

I want what once was Lucifer’s, that, which he so freely threw away!  I want to walk close by Your side…and talk with You each day!

So when the Father turns to me, and my ear hears Him say,

“Is it nothing to you…all you who pass by…as you look at the cross where My Son chose to die?  He died for you, so that Heaven you could gain!  Please, don’t say ‘No’…or it will all have been in vain!”

Then with thanksgiving in my soul, I’ll gladly turn and say, “Come into my heart Lord Jesus!  I choose You today!”

By:  Anita Mondragon February 2005


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